FAIL Fun

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  • Hi. Can I domesticate you?
  • Hi. My name is {name}. I’m running for president in 2012. And I could sure use your vote. Here…write down your number and I’ll call you to discuss my platform.
  • I don’t know you, but I think I love you already.
  • I dropped a tear in the ocean, the day I find it is the day I’ll stop loving you.
  • I envy your lipstick.
  • I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
  • I have only three months to live.
  • I must be a snowflake, ‘cuz I’ve fallen for you.
  • I must be in heaven because I’m standing next to you!
  • I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.
  • I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you.
  • I saw you, I had an asthma attack because you took my breath away!
  • I think my medication is wearing off.
  • If a star fell for every time i thought of you, the sky would be empty.
  • If beauty were sunlight, you’d shine from a million light-years away.
  • If beauty were time, you’d be an eternity.
  • If I could be anything I’d be a tear: Born in your eye, live on your cheek, and die at your lips.
  • If water were beauty you’d be the ocean.
  • If you know a person’s name: “Hi, [name].” How did you know my name? “Isn’t every beautiful girl named that?”
  • If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
  • If you were a chicken, you’d be impeccable.
  • If you were a laser, you’d be set on “stunning”.
  • If you were a library book, I would check you out.
  • If you were a new hamburger at McDonald’s, you would be McGorgeous.
  • If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you.
  • If you were ice cream and I were hot chocolate I’d pour all my love onto you.
  • I’m addicted to yes, and I’m allergic to no. So what’s it gonna be?
  • I’m feeling kind of insecure right now. Could I have a hug?
  • I’m invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
  • Is that baby oil on your forehead? Cause you shine like an angel.
  • Is there a rainbow today? I just found the treasure I’ve been searching for!
  • Is there an airport nearby or is that my heart taking off?
  • Is your name Gillette? Because you’re the best a man can get.
  • It must be a day off in heaven for an angel like you to be amongst us.
  • It must be dark outside. ‘Cause all the sunshine in the world is right here.
  • It’s always good for you to see me again.
  • It’s my birthday! How about a birthday kiss? [Is it really your birthday?]
  • No, but how about a kiss anyway?
  • It’s not my fault I fell in love. You are the one that tripped me.
  • I’ve gotta thirst, baby, and you smell like my Gatorade.
  • Man, you sure are bright girl! Were you raised by the stars?
  • Man: “Would you like to dance?” Woman:(looks at you up and down) “No thank you.” Man: “Sorry, you must’ve misunderstood me. I said: “you look fat in those pants!”
  • Man:”Girl, you are so rude!” Girl:”How am I being rude?” Man:”Because you’re looking so fine and not telling me you’re name.”
  • My name isn’t Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
  • My psychiatrist sent me for an MRI because she thinks I have a magnetic personality.
  • Oh my god, I thought I was gay… then I met you.
  • Oh no, I’m choking! I need mouth-to-mouth, quick!
  • Ok, I’m here, what do you want for your next wish?
  • Oooh, you’re lookin’ fine. Not in the good way, in the “you’ll do” way.
    Pull my finger.
  • Really like your peaches and I wanna shake your tree.
  • Shall we talk or continue flirting from a distance?
  • So, are you going to give me your phone number, or am I going to have to stalk you?
  • That’s a nice watch [Thank you] Actually, that’s a nice dress. [Again, thank you] Come to think of it, everything is nice on you.
  • The only thing your eyes haven’t told me about you is your name.
  • There aren’t enough “O”’s in the word “smooth” to describe how smooth you are.
  • Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say, “I’m not really this tall….I’m sitting on my wallet.”
  • Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
  • What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
  • What would you do if I kissed you right now?
  • When I saw you from across the room, I passed out cold and hit my head on the floor…so I’m going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
  • When’s our wedding date?
  • (While looking at stars) Baby, I didn’t see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was sitting right next to me.
  • Woman, I hate to see you go, but I LOVE watching you leave….
  • You are a 9.9999. You’d be a perfect 10 if you were with me.
  • You are like a candy bar: half sweet and half nuts.
  • You are so beautiful that you give the sun a reason to shine.
  • You are so sweet…I’m getting a toothache just looking at you…
  • You are the hottest thing since sunburn.
  • You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
  • You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
  • You know, you might be asked to leave soon. You’re making the other women look really bad.
  • You look beautiful today, just like every other day.
  • You look just like my mother.
  • You look like a big glass of water and I sure am thirsty!
  • You look like the type of girl who has heard every line in the book … So what’s one more??
  • You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
  • You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
  • You must be going to hell cause it must be a sin to look that good.
  • You MUST have a nice personality.
  • You remind me of a pop tart. (Why?) You’re cool cause you’re hot!
  • Your dad must have been retarded, ‘cuz you are special.
  • Your daddy must be a terrorist, because baby- you da bomb!
  • Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
  • You’re like a dictionary – you add meaning to my life!
  • You’re so hot you would make the devil sweat.
  • You’re ugly but you intrigue me.
  • You’ve been a bad girl/boy. Go to my room.

One Comment

  1. PARONIOD GUY says:

    IVE TRIED MOST OF THESE AND 5 OUT OFF 30 WORK

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